Sports

Joey Gallo: Will strike out for food


Joey Gallo lists hitting into the shift as one of his key skills.

Joey Gallo lists hitting into the shift as one of his key skills.
Image: Getty Images

The Major League Baseball lockout isn’t ending anytime soon. There was some hope that the Jupiter meetings could lead to a new CBA, but those meetings proved as useless as Pat Light against anyone not named Mike Trout. Now, with Opening Day canceled along with the first two series of the season, some MLB players aren’t taking any chances.

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Yankees’ slugger and former Rangers’ outfielder Joey Gallo has taken to LinkedIn and is looking for someone to offer him some work should the summer come and go without America’s pastime.

Gallo announced his new job search by posting images of his LinkedIn page to Twitter:

Clearly, Gallo doesn’t know the value of a college education. While jumping straight into the workforce from high school isn’t a bad thing, it’s really going to limit his opportunities this time around. His resumé is short, but he’s clearly loyal. He stayed with the same company for nearly a decade, even as the company started to fall apart after his fourth year there. Gotta respect the grind.

Where Gallo’s page really starts to get interesting though is with his ‘skills’. Gallo lists “striking out,” “hitting into the shift,” and “getting dressed weird” as his most prominent skills. Now, I’m not connected to Gallo on the site, but should Gallo ever accept my invitation to connect, I’ll gladly endorse him on the first two. After all, Gallo did lead the Majors in strikeouts with 213 in 2021. Can’t speak to the ‘getting dressed weird’ part though. Sure, there’s that story about Gallo putting on his uniform in a weird manner, but 1) I don’t see how that’s weird for a sport that’s rooted in superstition, and 2) I’m the type of guy who wears socks and flip-flops out to bars, so I can’t really criticize anybody’s fashion acumen.

Should Gallo accept my invite, I’d also gladly endorse his defensive skills. Gallo possesses incredible range for someone his size and an absolute cannon fit for Blackbeard’s ship. He’s won Gold Gloves in back-to-back seasons and routinely has some of the best defensive metrics in the game. He did struggle in right during his short time with the Yankees last season. I’m sure he’ll figure that out though.

Despite Gallo’s LinkedIn page clearly being made as a joke, and perhaps (actually, definitely) as a means to poke fun at Major League Baseball for dragging its feet on a new CBA for the upcoming season, some people did respond to Gallo’s requests. Brice Paterik, host of the Locked On Rangers podcast jokingly offered Gallo $10 million to be his co-host, which is actually more than Gallo is set to make with the Yankees in 2022.

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Maybe Gallo should pull an Aaron Rodgers and threaten to leave his team to host a show. That’d be something, right?

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Gallo isn’t the first professional athlete to make a LinkedIn page. Some high-profile NBA stars like Stephen Curry and Spencer Dinwiddie both have LinkedIn pages touting their entrepreneurial experiences off the court. However, Gallo’s isn’t nearly as serious, and hopefully, Rob Manfred and company will get a new deal with the MLBPA finished soon and Gallo will never have to use it.

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